Many, many moons ago, I wrote an article here on Gearfire about balance being the key to success as a student. One thing I never really went over though, is how to achieve that balance. I was young, and didn’t really know what to say on the topic. So, I spent many, many hours over the past many, many moons, doing my own personal research on how one goes about walking the middle path. At this point, I’d say that Aristotle would be quite proud of me.I film a weekly webshow for my own website, a self titled blog called A.Y. Daring. I write to young entrepreneurs, visionaries and lifestyle artists to inspire them, encourage them, and remind them of their purpose and goals. The show is called The A.Y. Daring Show. (I like to keep things simple and straightforward with naming.) This week’s episode was about how to achieve the balance I was talking about earlier, based on all the research I’ve been doing. It summarizes all the themes in all the works I’ve read into three key points, an is presented in less than 10 minutes. And since it directly relates to my earlier article, I want to share it with you guys and share these themes on Gearfire. Behold.

So in that episode, I discussed the three themes that I picked up on in my research. For a little more of an explanation, or if you can’t turn on your volume to watch it right now:

1) You have to make time for the things that matter to you.This is everything you hear about planning and prioritizing. As in, doing things now, making a study schedule, doing readings on time, etc. There’s nothing new to say here. Except that planning and prioritizing are both learned skills that require practise. I’d say you should give yourself a full term to break all the old habits of your past. If you’re not well on your way towards good study habits and learning skills by the end of the term (you be the judge of that!) then you’re not trying hard enough to make time for the things that matter, and a different strategy is in order.

2)  You have to learn to say no. This means letting go of you’re ego and admitting you can’t do it all. This also means that, to everything you say “yes”, you must commit yourself to it wholeheartedly and be honest when your whole heart isn’t enough to hold your attention or keep you motivated. I’m talking to you, girl-who’s-on-11-different-commitees-but-is-only-serious-about-two! And you too guy-who’s-only-going-to-law-school-to-impress-people!

3)  Making time for yourself. This is the theme behind all the things you read in the yoga and spirituality and beauty sections of the bookstore and what “The 7 Habits of Highly Successful People” talks about in the chapter about “sharpening the saw”. It’s why I spend so much time doing my hair, nails and makeup each morning. As I like to say “burnouts don’t make billions” as in, if you don’t take time to relax and enjoy the fruits of your labour, all your gardening efforts will be for naught. You get my metaphor.So now, go pour yourself a glass of champagne, run yourself a bubble bath, and sit int he tub for a while, thinking about what’s important to you, and what’s not, and how you’re going to do your priorities justice.

Question? Comments? Praise? Don’t forget to comment and tell me what you think!

So, my questions to you to get the conversation rolling:

1) What’s the one thing you always make time for each day, and why?

2) How do you say no politely?

3) What’s you’re favourite way to unwind at the end of the day?

My responses:

1) I always make time for makeup and doing my nails. Always. If you ever meet me in the street, and I’m not made up and my nails look ragged, feel free to ask my why my life is falling apart at the seams, as that would be the only thing that would keep me from looking my absolute best. I just do it for no other reason than the fact that I enjoy it. I can’t draw to save my life, but I can make a masterpiece with a tube of liquid eyeliner and some lipgloss, you know?

2) I have no clue! But I have learned that if someone asks you for help with something, and you don’t have time to help them, referring them to someone who could is a really great way to absolve yourself of the guilt!

3) At the end of each day, I unwind by drinking green tea and writing in my journal. I’ve started reading again too, which is helping me sleep better. I used to watch television like an addict, but then I stopped randomly and replaced evening screen time with a book. I feel like such an old person, snuggling up in my bed with tea and a digestive cookie (both of which I bring to bed with me) and a book, but it helps me sleep like lullaby.

I’ve just finished packing for university and for the first time in 6 years, my things are all in boxes. I moved around a lot as a kid, but for the first time ever, I’ll be moving alone.  I’m off to the University of Waterloo to major in Honours Environment and Business. (Told ya’ I’d make it in!) I’d be lying to you if I said I was particularly sad about that- I was hardly happy with my childhood home life. But I do feel an odd nostalgia about leaving behind the town and friends and teachers that I’ve come to know and love. I’ve never lived anywhere for as long as I lived in Burlington and now that I’m about to leave I can finally see why it’s considered one of the best cities in Canada to raise a family. Granted, the suburbia-ness of it all made me want to rip my hair out at times, and I kept hoping to see a Stepford wife pop open her chest to re-oil her robotic innards…but I seem to have made it out OK and I will actually miss this place.

So, I sat down the other day and came up with a list of things I need to do before move-in day. And I’m sharing it with ya’ll because I know for a fact that I’m not the only one who is currently feeling slightly bummed about suddenly having to be a grown up when being a kid was kinda-sorta-really-awesome. This isn’t actually my personal list that currently in my purse. I added a few experiences and generalized people’s high school experiences a bit. And it’s also based on the assumption that you didn’t hate every single second of high school. You should of course edit this list as you see fit, but the spirit of things is to tie up loose ends to allow yourself a fresh start.

1. Go back to the place you had your first  real, proper kiss that made you “get” what those romance movies talk about. Chill there for a bit. Review the event, moment-by-moment, savouring the crazy mix of touch, sight, sound, taste and smell. Remember the butterflies in your stomach and the pounding of your heart and the way your mind kept flipping back and forth between “OMG!” and “Am I doing this right?” and how afterwards you felt “that-much” older, slightly sexier and oh-so ready for more. Savour the memory.
2. Go back to your elementary school. Marvel at how, no, the buildings didn’t get smaller, you just got taller. Say hi to your old teachers, and say goodbye to the swing-sets and baseball diamonds. While there, go back to the spot where your first scrapped your knee, then move on to the plot of grass where someone first stood up for you and you then became instant friends. Walk down the hallway where you first saw your grade 3 crush and how cute their smile was the first time you got up the nerve to say hi. Go back to the cafeteria and remember how you used to trade Twinkies for Jo Louis’ with your best friend. Go back to the bathroom where you ran to cry when you found out the horrible news, and then out to the field where you learned to play four square, then go back to the spot where James told Claire to tell Morgan to tell Josh to tell Casey to tell you that Adam thinks you’re really great.
3.  Go back to your old high school and tell your teachers thank you. Then go to all the lockers you had over the course of the 4 years and leave a good luck note in each of them for whomever gets them next. Go back to the classroom where you had your first high school class, and the one where you had your last. Sit in your desk in each one for a few moments and appreciate how much you learned within those walls and during the time that lapsed between them. Go out to the spot where you parked your car the first time you drove it to school, and then go over to the spot where you accidentally backed into the teacher’s car. Run around the field one more time, then go stand in the gym where the school dances where held, and where you learned how to both slow dance, and grind your hips into those of the opposite sex as your first, fully clothed foray into teen seks.
4. (If possible) go back to where you had your first serious make out session and/or dropped your v-card. Relive those moments…if they were pleasant. If not, move on.
5. Log onto Facebook and tell your childhood crushes that you had crushes on them. Then let the feelings lay there, and be glad with the knowledge that your heart is now empty and ready for The Next Great Love Interest in your life story.
6. Sit in front of the teevee and drink hot chocolate while watching re-runs of Arthur, Dragon Tales, Power Rangers, Sesame Street and all the other shows you used to watch as a kid. Marvel at how Muffy on Arthur now has a cell phone and how Sesame Street is still totally awesome and how it still sucks that Reading Rainbow is over. (But don’t take my word for it!) And finally, thank the Higher Powers that you have YouTube now, so you don’t ever have to go without Mr. Rogers and the puppet people again. Brought to you by the letter A. For Awesome!
7. Get on a bus in the morning and spend the day riding around town, appreciating the physical world that has surrounded you all these years. Notice the signpost that told you that home was right around the corner after a long night out. Notice the trail you jogged along every evening. Notice the coffee shop where you had your first date, and appreciate how it’s still privately owned and terribly delicious. Get off and walk into the book store where you’d go with your friends to pass the time till your parents came to pick you up from the mall. Salute the City Hall for making things work. Toss some bread at a pigeon in the park. Kiss the tree that shaded you while you read all those novels over all those summers.
8. Go back to where you had your first menial minimum wage job. If possible, toss some change into the tip jar of the brave soul who now does what you did.
9.  Watch the sunset one more time.
10. Wake up early and watch the sun rise one last time.

Let’s not sully the wonder of the new by getting all sad about the old. But it is still important to at least appreciate where you’ve been, even if you don’t necessarily like it. For better or for worse, it’s the past that got you to where you are today, and it’s where you are today that’ll get you to where you want to be tomorrow. And with that, I leave you with Emily Dickinson, and hope that you will take home in your heart wherever you go:

Where thou art, that is home.

Image source

I have 2 weekend, 3 weeks and 3 blue Post-Its until my first exam. Yes- 3 blue Post-Its. See:

My first exam is the first blue blue Post-It in the third row, and there are three blue Post-Its before it. The green Post-Its are the weekends I have to study (far right), and the yellow ones are days where I don’t currently have any event scheduled that will require my mental or physical energy. (I apologize for the blurriness. Walls are surprisingly difficult to photograph!)

Why all the Post-Its? Because I woke up on Saturday morning in a cold sweat, panicked about everything I knew I had to do, but was completely unable to conceptualize how much time I had to do it all. Everything was written down, but I couldn’t turn the words on the paper in my day-timer into anything that made events clear in my mind. It’s my very last exam set of high school (I’m graduating afterwards!) and I’ve been feeling/putting a lot of pressure on myself to go out with a bang. But I wasn’t anticipating the high blood pressure that my personal expectations would bring. So I took 10 deep breaths and tried to figure out how to get organized so I can maximize my productivity in preparation for my exams.

When it comes to my world, I like three things:

• lists
• colour
• Post-It notes
• and Tina Fey

Okay, so that 4 things, but lets pretend it’s 3. So, I combined all of these things and made a Post-It calendar. Actually, it’s not a full calendar of the month, but I leave on June 26 for a 6 week vacation travelling the other side of the planet, so I didn’t bother with the rest of the days. The day my plane takes off is the last thing I’ve written:

I like this idea because I can see at a glance when everything is, as opposed to flipping through pages. I do have a month-at-a-glace page in my planner, but it had gotten messy with “maybe-happenings” and “not-sures.”  I applied the GTD principle of only putting in concrete events. For each of the days I have an exam, I also wrote the time and place so I won’t forget. It helps to keep this from becoming another ambiguous list of things that may-or-may not occur so you then have to spend more energy sorting it in your mind. Whew, that last sentence was a mouthful!

This calendar is on the wall beside my computer, where I notice it every time I look up. So when I’ve been spending too much time on Facebook, out of the corner of my eye, I notice everything I have to do, and I log off :

This calendar is easy to replicate for yourself, using any colour combination you wish.

And also, since I’m using this to track school work, I put in fun events too, so I don’t forget that life isn’t a 24/7 study session. Like the day of my tattoo appointment:

It’s something to look forward to.

So tell me, what’s your strategy for conquering the mental clutter that exams bring?

When planning revision, it’s a good idea to plan things out in advance. A tip for you all is try and make a list of what you need to get done in preparation for each exam paper, that is specific actions that will help improve your grade.

When you come to planning what you are doing for the week (a habit I will talk more about at a later date), I certainly find it far easier to plan everything out on paper. Once you have done this first step, that is a large amount of the preparation out of the way; it is now simply a process of slotting the actions into your schedule. I find it best to work on paper - the source for my calendar templates? I print weekly schedule calendars off the following site:

 http://www.printablecalendar.ca/

There is a whole range of different calendar templates available for use, and can be a great help for planning. The half hour blocks weekly calendar is the one I use. It lets you look ahead long enough to plan properly but with short enough times you can schedule effectively.

Try making (and sticking to) a plan and see if you work more effectively.

It may be rare for a student productivity blogger to draw inspiration from a film about card counting, but I have managed to do just that. I saw the film 21 a while back and absolutely loved it. If you want a little more background information on the film, (re)read “Do you dazzle? Do you jump off the page?” which I wrote last week. The part of the film I drew my inspiration from was when Ben faced a tough question in a prestigious scholarship application:

“Unfortunately - Desire doesn’t figure into this much. The ‘Robinson’ is going to go to someone who dazzles. Someone who just jumps off the page. It’s all about the essay - you need to explain to us, what makes you special, what life experience separates you from all the rest… What can you tell me Ben, that’s going to dazzle me?”

Since the post proved fairly popular, plus I had already promised a follow up post, here it is! Before you read on however; if you haven’t already, read the post linked above

A lot of you mentioned that the question “How do you dazzle?” and said that it was an interesting one to think about, which is why I am writing this post. My ideas in this post are also just that, something interesting (I hope) for you to think about, that is that I am not blindly saying this is the right thing for everyone, people may disagree with me, but I hope you will give the ideas some thought.

So how did Ben dazzle, how did he jump off the page?
(Slight spoiler warning if you planned on watching the film)

I let down my good friends, but as it turns out, they weren’t too bad at simple math either. I got beaten down by an old school Vegas thug who was having trouble accepting his retirement. But, I worked out a deal with him that got him a nice pension. And I lied to my mother, but I confessed the lie and she still loved me. For my senior year of college, I joined this team, and I learned this new skill. I went to Vegas 17 times to use it. I made hundreds and thousands of dollars. Then I got it all stolen from me… twice. How’s that for life experience professor? Did I dazzle you? Did I jump off the page? 

Now do not get me wrong, I’m not advocating that you take up card counting or gambling whilst at university! This did promote a few thoughts though.

 Extra Curricular Activities

First Thought

Oh, you are president of the ‘Watching Paint Dry Society’? Great!

Extra-curricular activities you find dull and boring, yet think look insanely impressive, are actually just dull and boring. When you aren’t engaged with the activity you are a part of, you tend to get very little out of it, which defeats the object of participating in such ideas. Try steer clear of getting involved in extra-curriculars’ you find boring or do because you think they look good, and instead do something you are really passionate about. This has one major bonus that it seems a lot less like work. Secondly, when you are passionate and engaged with what you are doing, you tend to be more successful at it. This means that you can take what you are doing a lot further, be a lot more successful and still have a great time.

Second Thought

Dare to be different

Activities such as being on the school band are things a lot of students have on their application form (but as I said above, if you enjoy them that isn’t a bad thing), but if there is something you really enjoy that is a bit different, there’s a better chance you will be remembered and sound more interesting at interview. This is saying that your life experiences do matter as well, and if you do the same extra-curricular activities as every other applicant, you have no unique life experiences and very little to distinguish yourself with. Even if you try something difficult and fail miserably at it, you have at least got a good story to tell out of it!

Examples include things such as starting a business or writing your own book. These are the sort of things most people could not imagine doing, and as such, give you life experiences that make you a stand out applicant.

University Admissions

Third Thought

When you reach the interview table, at university, you are over the first hurdle. At this point, your list of extra-curriculars’ is not going to help you. You have to demonstrate firstly, that you are somebody that the interviewer wants to teach, as lecturers are often the ones doing the interviewing. Furthermore, you have to show the inquisitiveness and thinking skills to be a competent learner. If your extra-curriculars’ add to this, giving you a great life experience, then that is great, but that alone will not cut it either.

As well as your school work and activities, you have to develop the other characteristics that make you the type of student that is interesting, having a good time, and has the key attributes that admissions tutors are looking for, things like ability to analyse information and good communication skills. The key here is balance, as you have to be able to develop all of these areas. Again, bonus points go to those people who have a great time doing it as well. It certainly makes them more interesting to talk to, and there’s the added bonus that you don’t feel burnt out by doing the things you enjoy!

Life

Fourth Thought
There are no re-runs in life. So many people see school as preparation for university, university as preparation for a job, all just one part of a big process. The truth is, this is all part of your life! It may be in aid of getting to an end goal, but you have to enjoy today otherwise you will end up burnt out and frustrated. Education offers you the chance to explore your interests and yourself, and it really is something to make the most of, not wish away. I know people who don’t want to be studying; they just want to be out working. This is the wrong attitude to be taking; you have to enjoy the things that you are doing now, not hoping to do. Anything less and there’s a good chance burnout is going to catch up with you sooner or later.

A quote for you to reflect on with this thought…

The tragedy of life is not that it ends so soon, but that we wait so long to begin it
Anonymous

Thanks for reading, if you liked this post please Digg it, share it with friends and/or post your reflections in the comments section below. I am happy to answer any questions you have or elaborate on anything I have written.

Generally speaking, there is so much going on all the time on a college campus and its surrounding town. It’s easy to ignore or forget about these events as we all get caught up in our own lives. However, one of the coolest parts about being in school is to have access to all sorts of speakers, concerts, groups, athletic games, etc. Take advantage of this! Most of these events are probably free or low-cost to you as a student. Here are a few ideas to keep up with all that’s happening at your school:

• Read the newspaper: If your school has a newspaper, it probably lists some of the upcoming events. Check it out!
• Read the emails: Many colleges send out aggregations of what is going on around campus via email. Don’t just delete these emails, because there could be some really interesting events happening.
• Check the calendar: Your school website probably has a calendar listing events like sports games and orchestra concerts.
• Event invites: Don’t necessarily ignore all those Facebook or E-vites invites you receive. You could be missing out on a choral concert or karaoke night at an on-campus coffee shop. Relatedly, sometimes it pays to go through the events of your friends.
• Pay attention: Check out the flyers, posters, sheet sign, and chalkings that are probably all over your campus.

What other ideas do you have?

© Maria Schwartzman 2009

I have traveled to 6 different countries (will be 7 within the next 20 hours) and over a lot of the United States, so I thought I would share some travel tips I’ve gained over the years.

•  Pack light.  You really don’t need the blow dryer and curling iron. Honestly, though, I pack a minimum number of clothes and accessories so that my suitcase is about half empty. I tend to buy a lot of souvenirs (including shirts, jewelry, etc) that I can wear and use on the trip. And by only packing half a suitcase I have plenty of room to bring everything home!
• Remember to bring your student ID. Either bring the one from your college or university, or get an International ID. You can get big discounts if you show your ID.
• Take your camera and plenty of storage space. I end up taking my computer too so that I can download my photos and, if I’m lucky, upload them to the web as soon as it happens.
• Bring an extra bag. I keep an extra carry on sized bag in my checked suitcase for the return trip home. (I really like souvenirs.) Usually you’re allowed two carry on bags, so my extra bag is considered my “personal” bag.
• If you wear glasses or contacts, bring an extra pair. You never know when you’ll lose or break something.
• Bring snacks for the plane. Depending on how long your flight is, you might get hungry and they might not feed you anything! Being hungry is one of the worst parts about traveling, especially if you can’t find a place to eat (or it’s super expensive).
• Go with the flow, and have fun. You’ll enjoy the trip more if you’re not stressed out.

Last but not least, enjoy the trip and have a great time!

Feel free to leave any other tips in the comments!

Image via WikipediaI’m nearing the end of the first semester of my last year of high school, and the other day I had an existential crisis, which is just business as usual for me. That particular nonsense is over now, but it did give me an opportunity to look back on the past few months, and reflect on what I’ve learned. The big secret key to high school success still stands. You must balance your life to be truly happy. Work some, play some. Study some, watch cartoons some. But there’s a little more to add to the list of overall “Things to keep in mind to retain your sanity.” In fact, I have 10 more things to add to the list! This is everything I wish someone had sat me down to tell me way back in September, exactly how I wish they would have told me. This isn’t another how to guide. It’s a literary pick-me-up.

Know thyself.  This is the “big picture” stuff- all the questions you never stop answering. But it will help you one thousand-fold if you at least have a vague idea. What do you want to be when you grow up? What do you want out of your life? Why do you want it? What is your definition of happiness? What is your definition of success? What are your values and principles? What do you refuse to compromise on? (Your integrity, hopefully!) In fact, knowing what you don’t want can actually be just as helpful as knowing what you do want, because it can help you figure out what to avoid. And if you avoid all the “icky” stuff, you can often land right in the good stuff! Is knowing thyself easy? Most certainly not. But the fun part of life is figuring it out!

Your accomplishments mean nothing if you’re too sleep deprived to enjoy them. This goes back to the Big Secret Key. Balance my friends, balance. If you’re really, truly honest with yourself, are you a) only taking on as much as you can handle and b) using your time wisely? No? Well then that’s a chance to improve! The amount of information out on the Internet on how to improve your personal productivity is exhaustive. But they all basically say the same 3 things. 1) Slow down. 2) Relax. 3) Only do what’s essential, ie focus. Am I simplifying it by huge amounts? Yes. But that’s because I’m only saying the essential!

Get involved. To a certain point. You are much more useful to others, and at peace with yourself if you are really good at one thing, rather than sort of okay/mediocre at fifty things. Quality over quantity.

Volunteer outside of school. Why? Because volunteering is good for your health, and it’s important to give back. I don’t really need to explain the importance of community service, do I? It’s just good citizenship! Giving back is a way to renew yourself, or “Sharpen the saw” as Stephen Covey would say.

Know your priorities. This is a lot like know thyself, but a little more focused. What is most important to you? Figure that out, and drop the unimportant stuff. Life’s too short to waste it on nonsense that means nothing to you. Yes, you will disappoint some people, but you know what? At the end of the day, it’s your life we’re talking about here. You know-the one you only get one of? If you don’t enjoy it because you were so busy worrying about others that you forgot about yourself, what good have you really done? The alternative to prioritizing and focusing on your goals (and possibly disappointing a few people) is not prioritizing, failing, and then disappointing everyone. There is a serious opportunity cost in trying to do it all. And that opportunity cost is your happiness.

Keep your room clean. As above, so below. Your surroundings are a reflection of what’s going on inside your head. It’s much less stressful to walk into a clean, tidy and well organized room than it is to walk into a dirty, smelly room. This is especially important if your bedroom is your primary place of study. An organized study space is crucial if you want to maximize your ability to focus on your work. Vacuum. Swifer. Dust. Open a window and get a little air circulating. In fact, just making your bed in the morning is often enough to be able to breathe a sigh of relief.

Your worries are not unique. Don’t feel so alone. Everyone else is just as confused as you are. Everyone else is worrying about whether or not they’ve made the right decisions as well. Everyone else is worrying about whether or not they’re good enough too. Everyone else is trying to know themselves, sort out their priorities, and find time to clean their rooms. You are not alone. You are unique, but your worries are not. Everyone else is going through life as well, it’s just that some people are better at hiding the worry lines better than others. Take a deep breath. We’re all in this together. Go hug someone.

 Don’t forget to smile. I don’t know if I’ve said this enough already, but enjoy yourself. Smile dammit. Even if you don’t feel like smiling, do it anyway. Fake your joy till you make it. Smile at the sky, your friends, your professors, your teachers, the lady who handed you your coffee at Starbucks this morning. But most of all, smile at yourself. You’re okay. You are enough. You have enough. You’re good enough…

You’re going to be OK. I promise.

So, I really hope this at least brightened someone’s day. This advice wasn’t meant to be as practical as it was meant to be calming, and hopefully inspiring. But tell me now, what do you wish someone had told you before you embarked upon life?