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Achieving Balance in The New Term

Many, many moons ago, I wrote an article here on Gearfire about balance being the key to success as a student. One thing I never really went over though, is how to achieve that balance. I was young, and didn’t really know what to say on the topic. So, I spent many, many hours over the past many, many moons, doing my own personal research on how one goes about walking the middle path. At this point, I’d say that Aristotle would be quite proud of me.I film a weekly webshow for my own website, a self titled blog called A.Y. Daring. I write to young entrepreneurs, visionaries and lifestyle artists to inspire them, encourage them, and remind them of their purpose and goals. The show is called The A.Y. Daring Show. (I like to keep things simple and straightforward with naming.) This week’s episode was about how to achieve the balance I was talking about earlier, based on all the research I’ve been doing. It summarizes all the themes in all the works I’ve read into three key points, an is presented in less than 10 minutes. And since it directly relates to my earlier article, I want to share it with you guys and share these themes on Gearfire. Behold.

So in that episode, I discussed the three themes that I picked up on in my research. For a little more of an explanation, or if you can’t turn on your volume to watch it right now:

1) You have to make time for the things that matter to you.This is everything you hear about planning and prioritizing. As in, doing things now, making a study schedule, doing readings on time, etc. There’s nothing new to say here. Except that planning and prioritizing are both learned skills that require practise. I’d say you should give yourself a full term to break all the old habits of your past. If you’re not well on your way towards good study habits and learning skills by the end of the term (you be the judge of that!) then you’re not trying hard enough to make time for the things that matter, and a different strategy is in order.

2)  You have to learn to say no. This means letting go of you’re ego and admitting you can’t do it all. This also means that, to everything you say “yes”, you must commit yourself to it wholeheartedly and be honest when your whole heart isn’t enough to hold your attention or keep you motivated. I’m talking to you, girl-who’s-on-11-different-commitees-but-is-only-serious-about-two! And you too guy-who’s-only-going-to-law-school-to-impress-people!

3)  Making time for yourself. This is the theme behind all the things you read in the yoga and spirituality and beauty sections of the bookstore and what “The 7 Habits of Highly Successful People” talks about in the chapter about “sharpening the saw”. It’s why I spend so much time doing my hair, nails and makeup each morning. As I like to say “burnouts don’t make billions” as in, if you don’t take time to relax and enjoy the fruits of your labour, all your gardening efforts will be for naught. You get my metaphor.So now, go pour yourself a glass of champagne, run yourself a bubble bath, and sit int he tub for a while, thinking about what’s important to you, and what’s not, and how you’re going to do your priorities justice.

Question? Comments? Praise? Don’t forget to comment and tell me what you think!

So, my questions to you to get the conversation rolling:

BLABLA

1) What’s the one thing you always make time for each day, and why?

2) How do you say no politely?

3) What’s you’re favourite way to unwind at the end of the day?

My responses:

1) I always make time for makeup and doing my nails. Always. If you ever meet me in the street, and I’m not made up and my nails look ragged, feel free to ask my why my life is falling apart at the seams, as that would be the only thing that would keep me from looking my absolute best. I just do it for no other reason than the fact that I enjoy it. I can’t draw to save my life, but I can make a masterpiece with a tube of liquid eyeliner and some lipgloss, you know?

2) I have no clue! But I have learned that if someone asks you for help with something, and you don’t have time to help them, referring them to someone who could is a really great way to absolve yourself of the guilt!

3) At the end of each day, I unwind by drinking green tea and writing in my journal. I’ve started reading again too, which is helping me sleep better. I used to watch television like an addict, but then I stopped randomly and replaced evening screen time with a book. I feel like such an old person, snuggling up in my bed with tea and a digestive cookie (both of which I bring to bed with me) and a book, but it helps me sleep like lullaby.

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50 Responses to “Achieving Balance in The New Term”

  1. Workers are entitled to fair pay and benefits. Companies have a reasonable expectation to earn a profit. How do we achieve these two things without losing our unions or business having to relocate overseas to stay competative? My own personal experience has been that the unions tie the hands of the company by having to many work rules. It should not take five people and eight hour shift to change a light bulb. That may be a little extreme but there are these kind of practices going on at Ford, GM and other union companies.

  2. Sierra says:

    1. I always make time to eat! If you don’t eat, you really can’t do much, can you? I even take the short five minute breaks I get during work and every single one, I force down a snack because otherwise I will forget.

    2. I don’t think you should have any qualms about saying ‘no’. It’s your life and you need to have time to live it. It is important to sound confident in your answer and at the same time, be sure to not over explain why you can’t make the commitment.

    3. I watch tv shows online. Usually funny, short ones like Accidentally On Purpose. It’s mindless, relaxing and enjoyable. :)

  3. Money Bins says:

    I love that you took the time to revisit your past achieving balance article and elaborate on how to actually achieve that balance. Thank you again.

  4. Making time for myself is one of the most difficult things to do. I need to learn, to work and find some time for my girlfriend. When dusk comes there is nothing to do but to sleep. I’m too much tired to do anything for myself. And during the day I just have no time. This is a real problem for me.

  5. Ayomide! says:

    @ Sierra- 1) True, true! I always make time to eat too- except now the focus is on healthy food, HAHA!
    2) I decided to practise what I preach just today actually, and dropped two commitments, explaining that I just didn’t have the time. And can I just say, living my life is darn liberating!
    3) Have you ever seen Ikea Heights? If you’re into online shows, you’ll like it. It’s a melodrama shot entirely using the decorated rooms in Ikea!

    @Money Bins- you’re welcome! Thank you for appreciating it!

    @amazing architecture- I’d have to say that making time for dating is a big difficulty for me too! It’s a weird balance, isn’t it, between romantic love (or at least, potential love) and love of work that you do?

  6. Making time for persoinal grooming and hygiene is important if you want to be socially acceptable….hahahahah. I always make time to take complete breaks, allowing myself to totally swiotch off and relax foir just a couple of minutes, whilst staring into the distance to alleviate computer monitor eye-strain.

  7. used tires says:

    Ayomide, I really love the enthusiasm you project in this video, that’s something I need to personally learn, perhaps you could also shed some light in a video for us on how you are just such full of life :D

    I’ll be following your new blog when its up :D

    Till then,

    Jean

  8. “Internet Marketing | Net Age said

    am January 6 2010 @ 12:33 pm

    Making time for personal grooming and hygiene is important if you want to be socially acceptable….hahahahah. I always make time to take complete breaks, allowing myself to totally switch off and relax for just a couple of minutes, whilst staring into the distance to alleviate computer monitor eye-strain.”
    I could not agree more with you here,one has to take a break every now and then in doing to this helps one to absorb more information, gives the mind time to refocus as well. Great post.

  9. Firstly Happy New Year to you.
    I have to say that I really agree with point 2, saying “No” is something that many of us have to start using, even me and it is something that I find really hard to do, I am always scared that I am going to hurt someones feelings, or if I do say “No” that person is not going too like me anymore, so for me its something that I really have to try hard to do this year, I need to put me first for a while.

  10. radyo dinle says:

    WTF what is this bro :S

  11. oyun oyna says:

    Back in the nineties, there were a series of commercials for the Taster’s Choice coffee company, revolving around two neighbors who met and eventually fell in love thanks to a common shared love of Taster’s Choice coffee. Sure, it may sound a little outlandish, but as most any college student will tell you, romances have been started on less.

  12. Bidet says:

    Its always good to have a balance, I like the idea of drinking green tea at night, it relaxes you and makes you sleep better at night.

  13. pen tablet says:

    I fully agree. The one thing I’ve learned during years of my education and work was that I need some time and space for myself. Without it I can’t work properly.

  14. mortgages says:

    It’s so important to make time for yourself and to spend some time regularly being alone if you want to truly experience personal self growth.

  15. radyo dinle says:

    A talented musician performs the song, Love Story by Taylor Swift, on the piano without any vocals or background music accompaniment.

  16. What considerations an individual will make when achieving balance between personal goals and entreprenurial ?

  17. From the moment you integrate into your life time management skills, you have opened several options that can provide a broad spectrum of solutions to your personal growth. It also creates more doors for opportunities to knock on.

  18. study skills says:

    Great video. Thanks for advice. Hope this semester is my best ever.

  19. India says:

    Heart and Soul
    Mind and Body
    Will and Resistance
    Cocoa and Puffs j/k

  20. India says:

    I read your question details and it even stressed me out. Have you tried talking to the professor about it? If he can’t recommend a solution and you feel better working alone for smaller scale projects then maybe you should suggest working alone. If working alone for smaller scale projects will affect your grade then maybe you shouldn’t risk it. Striving to be the best is hard work and it’s even harder when the people who are supposed to help you are working against you.

  21. jeggings says:

    I agree that the time spent alone helps you concentrate on your thoughts and get a different point of view on some things.

  22. India says:

    Yes, any time a account shows as paid even if it’s for less then the full amount it is a lot better then a charge off.

  23. I think Obama forgets about the 2 years that Democrats ruled Congress during the end of the Bush administration. Congress is the one that has the purse strings and not the president. I also think he forgot that he was a congressman during that duration too. Convenient memory.

  24. Time for yourself, proper eating and enough sleep. If you take care of those things the rest will be easy.

  25. India says:

    A question for British contributors.?

  26. India says:

    How do you achieve balance?

  27. India says:

    It has only been a couple of decades now where a majority of the people feel responsible for balance and harmony. Anyway, our resources will dwindle if we exploit them, so I feel that balance and harmony are not plausible, existing as the status quo. However, there is peace and compromise needed between humans, and between humans and nature, and I feel that it’s already a reality. Notwithstanding, the inevitable is, “We humans need to start adapting to natue, and quit using it to exclusively serve us

  28. jeggings says:

    Time for yourself is vital but there are other ways like trying to have good relations with people, positive thinking and the eager to evolve.

  29. Because it takes a relatively long time to execute, and in a situation in which milliseconds can mean life and death it just doesn’t make any sense. Doing a flip requires a preparatory movement in which you use your arms and legs to “get ready” to do the movement before exploding up into the flip.

  30. From a functional point of view this seems to work just fine and it makes complete sense from a usability point of view.

  31. Good article about balancing. I learn new things from this article.

  32. Everyone is busier than you are. Did that catch you off guard? When I interact with someone I do my best (and it doesn’t always happen) to think this (changing “you” to “I”). It helps to keep me from saying, “I’m so busy…”

  33. It’s the most sophisticated Twitter analytics tool available and it’s free. Plus, it integrates with Google Analytics (it’s the only Twitter analytics tool to do that) as well with Bit.ly. It also has a nifty Firefox plug-in that will let you see your most influential connections at a glance. No list of analytics tools would be complete without it…

  34. This depends on the type of bank you have it from. I have negotiated interest rates myself. For the most part I have a good record but have still been turned down. All you have to do is call them and ask nicely. At first the answer may be no. Let them know you are not happy and this is why the account is closed.

  35. I alway make time each day to work on my list for the day. As someone who overcommits alot, I have to learn to say no more. to relax when I get home my girlfriend always has a good way of helping me do that.

  36. You made some valid points here. I always take time for breakfast with my family. This is the most important time for us. At night a walk at the beach with my husband. :)

  37. evden eve says:

    Love Story by Taylor Swift, on the piano without any vocals or background music accompaniment.

  38. I gues the picture is nice. But flickr says it can’t be displayed which is not nice.

  39. you try doing physical exercises to go asleep at once.

  40. Thanks for sharing this article. i enjoyed it so much.

  41. mobile phone says:

    self analysis is key. You really need to know yourself, and how you relay yourself in conversation and attitude before you can truly direct your life in the right direction.

  42. Its always good to have a balance, I like the idea of drinking green tea at night, it relaxes you and makes you sleep better at night.

  43. Its always good to have a balance, I like the idea of drinking green tea at night, it relaxes you and makes you sleep better at night.

  44. I write to young entrepreneurs, visionaries and lifestyle artists to inspire them, encourage them, and remind them of their purpose and goals. The show is called The A.Y. Daring Show.

  45. I would definitely agree with the cup of green tea at nights as it is like a doctors’ solution.

    It also would help easing the mind and plan better for the next day.

  46. Making time for persoinal grooming and hygiene is important if you want to be socially acceptable….hahahahah. I always make time to take complete breaks, allowing myself to totally swiotch off and relax foir just a couple of minutes, whilst staring into the distance to alleviate computer monitor eye-strain.

  47. nakliye says:

    site is great thanks

  48. nakliyat says:

    comments are really helpful and informative .. thank you

  49. Its always good to have a balance, I like the idea of drinking green tea at night, it relaxes you and makes you sleep better at night.

  50. It’s hard to say whether the grid expansion was worth it, without it we’d be down to nine teams and lucky to have them so perhaps it was. Lotus and Virgin are on track and learning their cars so I’d give them the benefit of the doubt but Campos and US F1? Being at this point in the season without any track time is a farce. Perhaps Stefan GP and Prodrive would have been better choices.